Simply Business Coaching

Who are we trying to fool?

I heard a snippet from Sarah Ferguson's interview on Oprah Winfrey today. She said she was 'in the gutter' and she'd been drinking at the meeting where she offered access to her former husband in return for £500,000.  (Here's a short summary article on the BBC website)

Up until now, I've admired the way Sarah Ferguson worked her way out of massive debt and made good use of her title, and personally, I don't blame her for wanting to make money from her connections (after all, enough other people do it every day). Unfortunately for her, on this occasion she was caught by an under-cover newspaper reporter and, listening to those lame excuses has diminished her somehow in my eyes. More so because she chose such a public place to make them.

I learned at a very early age that it was far better to own up and apologise when I'd done something wrong or made a mistake - preferably before it was found out by anyone else! Making excuses and embellishing them at every telling simply prolonged the agony and fooled no-one (especially not my mum!)

Since starting up in business, I've known that, as I'm the only one here, the buck very obviously stops with me! Yet sometimes I still try to make excuses or justify to myself why I haven't done something - until my inner critic pipes up to remind me what I'm doing.

It really is so much easier, not to mention less stressful, to simply accept being at fault. Then we can put the experience firmly behind us, learn from it - and move on.

What is it about making excuses or shifting the blame when we make mistakes or don't achieve our goals? Do you understand, because I still don't.

I'd love to hear what you think, so please feel free to comment below.  And if you enjoyed this post, a Retweet would be much appreciated!

Making the Time Right

I often don't know what I'm going to write about until I start typing!  Sometimes I feel as though I'm rambling - and then a blog post or article starts to take shape, one which might not have not have come into existence unless I had started typing....

The saying "If you wait for the right time, it will never come" is both true and false.  It's true because we need to push beyond what is holding us back and take action if we are to achieve our goals.  It's false because sometimes we have to get 'stuff' out of the way before we can act.  I'm often pleasantly surprised when clients call to book coaching, sometimes months after we originally spoke, because the time is now right for them to be coached.  On the other hand, I've learned not to take is personally when an enquiry seems to come to nothing - the time isn't right for that person just now.

If the time isn't right, what we're often saying is that we're not ready to face our fears.  A useful question I ask clients at this point is: "What needs to be in place to make now the right time?"  This gets all the 'stuff' out in the open and, like shining a bright light into a corner, reduces the fear of what is lurking there.  Listing what needs to be in place puts the fears into perspective - perhaps some of those fears belong to other people?  Others may be old limiting beliefs which can be dealt with .... before you know it, you're taking action and turning now into the right time.

Waiting for the time to be right, if it means allowing our fears to hold us back, is giving away our power and our dreams for a pittance to the lowest bidder.  Taking action, however small, is so empowering that we are encouraged to keep going - and now truly does become the right time.

But I already knew that!

Was the comment from a business owner I'd been speaking with about developing her online presence. Judging by the tone of voice, she wasn't too happy to find out that I didn't have a magic formula to transform her business without any extra work on her part.

The trouble is, there's a big gap between knowing what needs doing and actually doing it!  And it got me thinking. 

I've been guilty myself, in the past, of having a lot of 'shelf help' - buying lots of how-to books, training programmes, and attending many seminars.  All in the vain hope that I would stumble across the missing part to build my business effortlessly.

One of the problems is the sales copy accompanying events and product launches.  They all promise the earth - and then deliver ..... you guessed it ..... stuff I already know about!

So I've made 2 promises to myself.  The first that I will not buy any more products or download any new information, without first checking my groaning bookshelves (real and virtual) to see if I haven't already got an equivalent.  The second promise is that I will systematically work my way through each of the programmes in my possession instead of leaving them to gather dust.

Once I've taken action and done the work, it will be interesting to see how much further forward I am in my own business.  I think that business owner's comment may have done me a big favour!

What about you?  Do you keep finding 'new information' you already knew about?

The Secret to Finishing - is getting started!

I've recently joined a Mastermind group. We meet weekly (by Skype conference) and each commit to an action we will take by the next call. No excuses are accepted for non-achievement of that action - just a bald 'Yes' or 'No' statement of fact.

So far I've been committing to actions I'd already been working on and which are at varying degrees of completion - it's great to get them finished at last!

But the whole point of belonging to this great group, for me, is to start and finish projects that will make a real difference to my business. The sort of projects that are a bit of a stretch and that I've been putting off starting for that very reason.

One of the reasons procrastination exists is to keep us safe from failure, but not even making a start simply keeps us in the rut of discontent.

I'm going to stick my neck out a little further each week and stretch beyond my comfort zone because that's the only way to achieve more. I'll let you know how I get on. Gosh, this is very public now, isn't it?

What would you like to finish that you haven't started yet?

Confidence is Important for Business too

When I first qualified as a Life Coach, before venturing into the exciting world of Business Coaching, helping people to improve their confidence was a regular part of my work.

You'd think people starting up a business would have plenty of confidence, yet that isn't necessarily the case - here are a few notes from my client files to explain what I mean:

Networking - walking into a room full of fellow business owners can be quite nerve-wracking, and the thought of having to stand up in front of everyone and talk about what you do, can be enough to put more timid souls off the whole idea!

Sales - picking up the phone to make those dreaded cold calls - and even follow-up calls - is another business activity many people keep putting off until another day.

Meetings - are probably less about confidence and more about the need to thoroughly prepare beforehand, and have a clear goal each time.

Presentations - whether delivering a talk to a group of your peers or to just one major potential client, these can be very important business opportunities. Many people avoid them.

Internet - it surprised me to discover some people are reluctant to become visible on the internet by having a website or starting a blog (but I'm resisting the use of video on my own site, so I'm starting to have some sympathy ....)

Although the personalities involved were very different, an instant confidence boost came when I reminded each of them how good they are at what they do and how well they know their stuff.

Building confidence is a vital requirement for business owners, and I think its importance is often forgotten until the need to learn all the varied skills associated with running a business overtakes the initial joy of making a living doing something we love and excel in.

Is there an area of your business where your confidence has been, or still is, a bit shaky?

Tiny Revolutions

By “revolution,” let’s consider these your moments of break away. You decide one day that you loathe being a cubicle farmer. You decide one day that you need more money. You decide one day that you’re sick of feeling fat and lazy. You pick whatever the “cause” is. What happens next is that you move from thinking into action-taking.

via www.chrisbrogan.com

This great post from Chris Brogan reminds us of the importance of making decisions and acting on them. Planning is good, action is even better!

Are You a Workaholic?

A workaholic is someone who is defined and obsessed by their work.  If you took their work away from them, they wouldn’t know what to do.  A workaholic uses their work to avoid the rest of their lives, most often relationships.  A workaholic is not a happy person because they are constantly in fear of losing the one thing in life they are successful at – their work.  While it is great to be passionate about what you do, it’s important that your work isn’t a way of avoiding living the rest of your life.

Overwork is different to workaholism.  Overwork is when you have too much to do at work and you have other interests and relationships outside of work but not enough time to spend on them.

However, being a workaholic or being overworked do have one thing in common – they both cause stress.  Stress can lead to physical and/or emotional health problems which in turn are going to lead to a drop in performance levels, and which can directly affect your company’s sales and profitability.

Keeping a healthy balance between work and the rest of your life means you and your employees will be more effective.  You will be able to be totally focused on getting those sales and delighting your customers during business hours and enjoy being with your family and friends outside of work.

Quick Check - Answer the following questions:

1.    I won’t delegate because no one can do the job to my standards.
2.    I find it difficult to relax.
3.    I often work late and/or at weekends.
4.    I have missed or cancelled arrangements with family or friends because of work, on several occasions.
5.    I feel most comfortable at work.

If you answered ‘yes’ to any of these questions you need to take care that you are giving enough attention to the other important areas of your life.  The more ‘yeses’, the more urgent it is that you take action quickly.

I bet you haven't put this in your diary yet!

So far in this series of posts about planning, we’ve looked at setting aside time for future planning, planning meetings, holidays, marketing and projects.  What else could there be?  How about your own personal growth and development?  You know, the bit that usually gets completely overlooked!

This post is for you if you think that taking time to go to seminars, listening to classes, working with a coach or investing in training materials is self-indulgent, that you can’t afford it, or even that you’re too busy.

Unless you’re just about to retire from your business, you simply must stay up to date and continue to learn if you want to keep up with your competitors – and hopefully ahead of them.  If you neglect your own personal development, you’ll soon be at a disadvantage and your business will suffer.

Check out what’s new in your trade and professional publications; keep an eye on emerging trends that will affect your business. What do you need to learn and to do? 

Is there a gap in your knowledge that needs plugging, or a skill to brush up that would make a real difference to the future of your business?

Find out what you need to learn, where and when you can learn it and plan for it now.  Budget for the expense and block out the time in your diary.

Learning to be confident

While out networking last week, I met some people who were feeling very nervous.  A couple were attending their very first networking meeting having been in business for just a few short weeks!  They weren’t sure what to expect.

Another person was nervous because she was about to give a 10 minute presentation and had never done that before.

It’s very natural to lack confidence when faced with a new experience or situation.  Some people are reluctant to put themselves in a position where they feel unconfident.  They won’t even try anything new, because they don’t want to ‘make a fool of themselves’ or be less than brilliant at it.  Such an attitude can really hinder progress, both in business and in life!

If you think back to the very first time you got behind the wheel of a car – I’ll bet that was a bit scary to begin with, but you wanted to be able to drive so you persevered.

If we only did what we felt confident at, we’d never try anything new and would miss out on some wonderful experiences.  The first time is always the most nerve-wracking, the second time less so….  over time we build up confidence and, what used to be daunting, becomes familiar and ‘easy’.

When confidence issues surface for my coaching clients, this is what I say to them:

- Ask yourself ‘what’s the worst thing that could happen if you tried …x…..?’
- Next, ask yourself ‘If that happened, would I be able to handle it?’

This is a very effective exercise.  The chances are that the worst thing that could happen won’t.  And, if you could deal with the worst thing, you can certainly deal with anything else!

The first-time networkers were surprised at how much they enjoyed themselves and the lady giving the presentation was really interesting and got a round of applause.  They survived their ‘ordeals’ and gained in self-confidence.

What are you learning to feel more confident about?

Taking the plunge!

When I started my first business, as is so often the case, I didn’t have much money to spend on anything.  Coming from the big budgets of a global corporation, it was quite a challenge to learn how to get maximum impact for minimum outlay!  I still get great satisfaction from finding a ‘good bargain’.

However, this frugality has also backfired on me and held my business back.

You see, I believed it was wrong to spend much on training to learn more about business.  But the free or low-cost seminars and workshops just left me increasingly frustrated because they didn’t give me the whole story!

I’d been following several very successful business owners whom I admired, hearing them tell about the importance of investing in their personal development, and that they spent as much as they could afford (sometimes even more than was comfortable) on hiring a coach and training.

At some point a couple of years ago, it dawned on me that my belief was actually holding me back from success.  It wasn’t a case of waiting until I could comfortably afford to invest in training at all!  The training had to be done first, and then the business would be more successful.  Not really a light bulb moment, more of a ‘Duh, why didn’t I think of that before?’ moment!

All the time I was thinking small and penny pinching on my personal development, I was in effect saying that neither my business or I deserved more.

As soon as I took the plunge and started investing serious amounts of time and money in training and coaching for myself, that’s when I began attracting more business.  I was even able to get some of the training paid for under a government initiative!

Business is still growing, and I’m still investing in it!  Never again will I be a ‘cheap-skate’ because I now know that my business is worth the best.